You Scientists!

What the movies and TV have to say about the world’s most maligned profession.

“They say he was a scientist, or something.”
—Unnamed gendarme, Murders In The Rue Morgue (1932)

“It’ll be a cold day in hell before I ever get involved with scientists again!”
—Colonel Holt, Project X (1968)

“I am a scientist, not a madman!”
—Professor Emmanuel Hildern, The Creeping Flesh (1973)

“Forgive him. He can be a brute sometimes. But that’s how all scientists are. With the sensitivity of a rock.”
—Scientist’s wife, The Untamed (2017)

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3 Responses to You Scientists!

  1. Dawn says:

    slightly off-topic, but I thought this was the best place for this
    c’nhjm (my cat wanted to say hi, and jumped on the keyboard)
    I saw the movie Kingsmen last weekend, and had some questions for the mad scientist in the movie
    SPOILER ALERT: he hands out free apps to everyone in the world so they can access the internet for free, then sends out signals that drives everyone into a homicidal rage. This is his answer to Climate Change – reduce the population rapidly.
    1. What mortality rate are you expecting? From the scenes, it doesn’t look as if anyone unprotected will survive.
    2. Would anyone be naturally immune to the signals? Would they be killed anyways by everybody else?
    3. Who’s going to clean up the mess? There will be decomposing bodies everywhere.
    4. Will the signal reach the areas of the world with no internet access? Is there any such area left?
    5. The politicians and the super-rich folk who aligned with you will apparently be the only survivors. Seriously, you’re going to build a new world with that lot? None of them have done an honest day’s work in their lives.
    I suppose I can’t expect too much rational thinking in a move that starts out by cutting a man in half, from head to toe, with no apparent bleeding.


    • RogerBW says:

      1-2, 4: At a rough estimate, it looks as if roughly ¼ of the world’s population have smartphones. So at most you’re looking at a 25% rationalisation, plus whatever level of secondary casualties the victims cause (probably pretty local, as I assume they won’t be able to operate vehicles). More effective if, as in Wikipedia, it’s a plain old SIM card – mobile phones have reached very nearly everyone who wants one, which is most people.

      Personally I have a 3D printer, a scythe, and a 4,000-gallon potable water reserve. 🙂

      3: The rats will have a field day. And the crows.

      5: Ah, it’s Galt’s Gulch all over again.


      • lyzmadness says:

        Sooo…the plan is to save the people who, if not directly responsible for climate change, were very little help in combatting it by sensible means when they had the chance? As opposed to saving some people who might actually be useful, post-apocalypse?

        This plan doesn’t sound very sanitary. I hope some means has been found of protecting the water supply?

        Ah, the bloodless bisection! – big brother of the bloodless decapitation.


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